I didn’t see it coming

December is never an easy month for me. Usually, the list of things I wanted to do but didn’t is far too long. The goals I set for myself remain sadly unchecked, and the milestones I actually reached don’t feel the way I thought they would. As for everything I wanted to improve about myself... well, I always end up telling myself that “next year will be the one.”
All of this makes for a month colored by a sense of sadness and a general lack of faith in the year to come. Even if I start a year with the best intentions, it will surely end just like the ones before it. I know this mindset doesn't help, but I tend to save my "good intentions" for January. I let the end of the current year be a time to simply sit back and lick my wounds.

But a moment ago, something... happened. I was walking down the street, having just stepped out of the metro right as it was closing. The weather felt more like autumn than winter, that kind of fine drizzle that doesn't even make you want to bother opening an umbrella. And yet, inside, I felt truly happy.
I was walking home from dinner with some wonderful people. It was one of those simple evenings where you have to stop yourself from saying out loud, "Please, let’s stay just a little longer".
I met them when I moved to this city, and they have truly changed my life here for the better.

As I walked, replaying the night in my head, I caught myself thinking that maybe this 2025 wasn’t so bad after all, if it led me here. Even the years before it seem to have a purpose now, because they were the path that led me to these people. I felt a sense of genuine joy, something that, for me, is rare.

I usually write these kinds of things in the heat of the moment, almost as an attempt to "bottle up" the emotion that I felt while I wrote it. On one hand, I want to impress it into my memory; on the other, I hope that by reading these words in the future, I might be able to relive that feeling, even for just a second.
But looking back on it now, with a cooler head, maybe I’m just that "awkward" person who sends a thank-you message to a silent group chat after a night out, but I am sincerely happy and grateful. And I wanted to say it, right here, in black and white.

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